my parents: your teenage years are the best years of your life!
me: you mean it gets worse
“Who cares if it was racist, it was funny!”
I hate watching shows once a week, I’m more of a season a day kind of person.
I imagine two scenarios in owning this clock:
1) It singing Be Our Guest every time someone visits.
2) Every morning I’d hear this “GIRL YOU LATE. IS THAT REALLY WHAT YOU’RE WEARING TODAY? I MEAN YOU’RE ALREADY LATE SO I’D GO CHANGE AT THIS POINT.”
SASSY GAY GRANDFATHER CLOCK
Are we going to ignore the fact that it’s wearing a watch?
It has to know what time to display on its face.
So I don’t know if you knew but there are these new mouthwash bottles.
And when you squeeze the bottle the top fills up.
And no more will come out.
So here’s my proposition…
YOU WILL NEVER NEED A SHOT GLASS AGAIN
YOUR MOVE ALCOHOL INDUSTRY
woah that’s brilliant
I can always find my people. Even on Tumblr.
i need like 40 more followers hell yeah
what do you need them for
were taking north korea by sundown
It’s annoying when you are fucking fed up with someone’s shit but you don’t want to start something so you have to pretend like you don’t care
did you mean: obama with republicans